For fiery desire, it usually isn’t a lack of just one element. In this 2nd installment of the Desire Trifecta, I delve into the physical aspects of desire.
For PHYSICAL, there are muscles that can improve desire. You have probably heard of Kegels. And Kegels aren’t just for women. Engaging your pelvic floor muscles brings blood flow to the genitals, so it heightens arousal. When the pelvic floor muscles are toned, it is possible to experience vaginal orgasms and longer, stronger erections.
Plus these muscles help with any little leaks, sneezes and pees, post-void dribbling which and be a subconscious deterrent to intimacy.
You will find when you are doing daily Kegel flexes, that you are mindful of your sexual core and the sacral chakra that drives life force energy. This is a key physical component to maximize during self-pleasure time, because when those muscles are properly toned, you achieve orgasm quicker. You can combine these first two of the Desire Trifecta by doing an activity that I adapted from Masters and Johnson, called Sensate touch. If you haven’t watched Masters of Sex, I highly recommend it.
What sensate touch does is really tune into the connection of physical touch, focusing just on where your fingers touch your body, not everything that is going on around you. M&J used it to connect couples experiencing lack of intimacy. I like my students to use it on themselves first to connect to their body. I suggest using a massage candle, and recently I have added using the Rosebud Woman Balm, genitally, creating a ritualistic activity with the Rose Quartz Wombstone. Adding a variety of textures, temperatures and sensations, enhances the activity and allows for new experiences.
P.S. If you struggle doing kegels on your own, the kGoal and kGoal Boost are amazing for isolating the specific muscles. The Boost is great for men, those who want to avoid vaginal insertion, and for learning to relax the pelvic floor muscles.